The Monitor's American Idol Chat

A far-from-perfect 10 are left — which contestant decided to make good use of Gwen Stefani’s rad music selections? Which decided it was disco night? Find out as Idol Chat reviews the Top 10 of American Idol.

BRANDON GARCIA: Tonight the Top 10 tackled Songs By Singers Gwen Stefani Likes. While it’s definitely one of the most oddball theme nights in memory, Gwen Stefani has surprisingly good taste in music, and overall it was the best setlist of the season, the only concert I’d have paid to see. I came across a spoiler list of tonight’s song choices, and everyone performed more or less as I expected them to. Gwen, subdued and icy without lipstick, seemed a little disappointed overall, perhaps because not one of her Top 10 pupils heeded her only piece of advice: Stick to the melody, lose the Idol-isms. I feel ya, Gwen. And while tonight couldn’t compare to last week’s Idol On Acid, it was miles better than Diana Ross Week. 

MARITZA HAMILL: Oh dear me, another night of Idol fun. Or at least this is what the night lends itself to be. After an epic Sanjaya performance last week, I’m sure a number of us long for what he has up his delicate sleeves next. Sit back and take in the Idolicious fun.

 

Click on the contestants’ pictures to see their performances from last week on YouTube.

 

“Last Dance” (Donna Summers) Watch the original

J. CANTU AND AMANDA FLORES: Wow, LaKisha looked 10 years younger than last week. That was an impressive start. We hope the rest of the night will be just the same. The women, again, are a lot more powerful than the men. Great energy from LaKisha, like always. This is Amanda’s favorite song, and LaKisha did it justice. We just hope she doesn’t get stuck in the same ole ‘70s rut because that is what she sings better. SCORE: 7  

BRANDON GARCIA: Well, that settles it: One way or another, LaKisha will find a way to sing the dullest, most tired song available. On a night when her opponents chose cool songs by The Police and at least attempted to outdo No Doubt, LaKisha gives us Donna Summer’s “Last Dance” in a dress that made her look like a black Buddha standing on rickety prosthetic legs. LaKisha’s confidence was nowhere to be found and her reliably in-tune voice took the night off. She basically dared voters to send her home. She just might get her wish tomorrow. SCORE: 3

CHRIS BENITEZ: I really don’t care for LaKisha’s voice. Bold statement? Well, I feel it is powerful but lacks feeling and character. Tonight, she was OK. If she wants to win, she has to blow everyone away. I don’t think that is happening. SCORE: 6.5

GLORIA CHEEVER: I really liked her outfit tonight! I’m glad Simon commented about her dress a few weeks ago because it’s been better ever since. This was a great choice for her. I wasn’t blown away — but it was really good. SCORE: 8

MARITZA HAMILL: Well, well, my darling, ‘tis the season to be singing fun songs. Congrats on the song choice — I see this wonderful voice now being put to good use. The other songs can get a bit dreary … so with this bit-o-joy, I can say I like what I hear.  SCORE: 8

“Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic” (The Police) Watch the original

J. CANTU AND AMANDA FLORES: Chris has let us down the past couple of weeks. He tends to get off-tempo every week and we don’t know why. Is he still getting nervous? He hasn’t had the coming-out party we have been waiting for, and time is running out. He needs to step it up NOW. His highs were off and again; every week, he tends to be faster than the band. Doesn’t he rehearse all week long? SCORE: 5

BRANDON GARCIA: As soon as I heard he was going to sing this, I knew it’d be bad news. Instead of bubbly and charming, we got off-tempo and aimless. Like LaKisha, Chris sounded overwhelmed — even he looked annoyed at his performance, which ended abruptly on a particularly foul note. And while he looked sort of ruggedly well dressed in a wool-lined leather jacket, his meandering around the stage and stilted gesturing were even more stomach-turning than usual. Chris is usually better heard and not seen; tonight, neither option was tolerable. SCORE: 5

CHRIS BENITEZ: Chris Sligh started off pitchy; his tone sounded strong until the chorus. I always feel like Chris is going to crack, and he finally did today. He looked sloppy, and he sounded vocally tired. Like I’ve said before, I don’t know how much better Chris can get. SCORE: 5.5

GLORIA CHEEVER: I didn’t really love this. He has a great voice, but this didn’t do it justice. It was definitely less than entertaining. SCORE: 5

MARITZA HAMILL: Oh, dear … not another cool song that can’t be sung cool. If that makes sense. Gwen was right with the whole pitchy sound. I am counting the days for this guy … I think he may be next to go home. Nice guy, REALLY?!? Dunno?? I can quit him. SCORE: 4

“I’ll Stand By You” (Pretenders) Watch the original

J. CANTU AND AMANDA FLORES: Our rocker girl really turned it up this week. She chose the perfect song for the occasion. It was a great recovery from last week. She looked very good. A classy rock girl. Is that an oxymoron? She wasn’t. We hope this is the step up for Gina, and we will see great things from her. SCORE: 7 

BRANDON GARCIA: “Stand there and be very emotional,” Gwen Stefani recommended. It’s hard for me to buy Gina as “emotional” or vulnerable when she’s dressed as go-go dancer from a Marilyn Manson video, but the restrained vocal approach was refreshing. Gina’s pretty convincing in this lighter rock style, but I wish it hadn’t been so rough around the edges. Too many pointless vocal runs and longing glances at the camera for my taste. SCORE: 7

GLORIA CHEEVER: Wow, she looks great! What a great performance! I think she was really emotionally connected to this song, and that really made a difference for her. She has a fantastic instrument! SCORE: 9.5

CHRIS BENITEZ: It started off really good, spot on! I was not too crazy about the arrangement towards the end. Not her fault in my opinion. The song was a great choice, better than Evanescence was for her. I think Gina has a lot of potential, but picking the right songs is so vital to her. I really don’t know how far she will go. We will see. SCORE: 7

MARITZA HAMILL: Ohhhhhhh, gooodie! Gina has made a 180 and makes me want to vote for her!! Woooo! I’ll stand by you, Gina. Ignore the galantince set up for you last week. I change my mind, you can stay. Loves! SCORE: 8   

 

“Bathwater” (No Doubt) Watch the original

J. CANTU AND AMANDA FLORES: Go away, Sanjaya!!! A village has lost their idiot. Why is he still here? Just hearing him makes our blood boil. My poor TV always takes the brunt of it. Bask in the fact that people are voting for the worst-sounding person in order to throw a monkey wrench into American Idol — it’s time for you Sanjaya to enjoy the limelight. I wonder if he knows how he is still in the competition. Would it bother him? Go home! SCORE: 1

BRANDON GARCIA: Oh, Sanjaya’s Hair. Week after week you’ve made bold choices that have usually worked in your master’s favor. I can’t explain why you transformed into a Pomeranian tonight. Maybe you got too big for your britches. Maybe an Idol stylist with an agenda was out to make sure Sanjaya suffered for humiliating the company last week. Even though he gave a competent if not edgy reading of one of Gwen’s better songs, no one paid attention to him — all eyes were locked on you. With Crying Fanatic Girl locked up in the mental ward and Sanjaya singing lines like “I know I’m diving into my own destruction,” it’s back to hard shower water and Herbal Essences for you after tonight. SCORE: 4

CHRIS BENITEZ: This guy is riding his own wave! Where will it take him? I sure can’t tell you. I’ll tell you what, if Sanjaya and Lakisha had CDs released right now, I think Sanjaya might out sell her. I would buy neither, but you get the point — he is getting a lot of votes. Music is crazy, isn’t it? SCORE: 4

GLORIA CHEEVER: What in the world?! No, Sanjaya …you’re not Nadia Turner. You can’t get away with the crazy hair! The vocals weren’t that bad, but I think he should’ve gone home a long time ago. Thank you to all the great Web sites out there … you’re really making a difference. SCORE: 5

MARITZA HAMILL: Snick, snick, snick….. Even the judges are at a loss for words. The pony hawk, no mas, no! He he he he… Sanjaya, you’re loved … just not by me. SCORE: Coo-coo out of 10

 

“True Colors” (Cyndi Lauper) Watch the original

J. CANTU AND AMANDA FLORES: San Antonio did a little better than last week. She still has the annoying Sandy-from-Grease voice. There is no way she will be able to change that, so song choice has to be at its utmost with her. Haley, again, did not choose a good song. A lot of people have done this song, and I think I heard a better rendition of it last week at a local karaoke. Sorry Haley, we think you are going be to Remember the
Alamo this week. SCORE: 3

BRANDON GARCIA: Haley’s momentum came to a grinding halt the moment she opened her mouth and little old lady sounds emerged as she perched innocently on the stage. The talentless sex kitten we were introduced to last week has left the building. The talentless pageant queen is back, the Dainty Hand of Profundity has returned to haunt us and we were reminded of Haley’s true colors: Tedious, too sweet by half and terrible, through and through. Gwen called Haley’s inept vocal acrobatics “so unnecessary” — kind of like Haley herself. SCORE: 2

CHRIS BENITEZ: I think her time is coming. What time you might ask? Well, she is not going to win so what do you think? Yeah, she is fortunate to even get this far. Her pageant voice kind of came out again today. I would be very surprised if she doesn’t go home tomorrow. SCORE: 4

GLORIA CHEEVER: This was kinda nice. It was all a little too soft for me. I think that’s in part to the fact that she kinda struggles with her “belt.” She sings everything in head voice — so it doesn’t have that power behind it. SCORE: 7

MARITZA HAMILL: Nope! Lost it this week. Flattery will only get you so far. I think Paula thinks you’re hot though … but your voice did not land you a safe spot in the Idol Zone. Sorry Haley, you may be going home too … tear for you. But look on the bright side — Disney is hiring right now. SCORE: 4 out of 10  

“Every Breath You Take” (The Police) Watch the original

J. CANTU AND AMANDA FLORES: Phil is back. We loved the way he looked on stage this week. We believe Phil is the strongest of the men. We loved the hat, made him look a lot more comfortable and his vocals this week were great. Did it almost sound like Sting? Maybe if you lowered the volume on the TV … really low. Very smooth, Phil. SCORE: 6  

BRANDON GARCIA: I imagined the worst when I heard Phil was going to sing this song — bumbling low notes, agony faces, etc. On the contrary, Phil was calmer and more collected than he’s been all season (‘80s is his ticket, I’m telling you). He kept the Idol-esque vocal runs to a minimum, and his voice came out sounding pure and unfettered. Gwen was “pleasantly surprised.” Me too — this performance inspired me to cast my first vote of the season. Please keep a hat on forever, Phil. SCORE: 8.5 CHRIS BENITEZ: Phil Stacey actually sang pretty well tonight, but would I buy his CD? No, I wouldn’t. Why? I could buy so much better with my money. I find him as interesting as Sheetrock. With that said, he did sound OK today. On the judges, does Paula actually think you can just belt a whole song?  Well, you can, but the dynamics would be lost. Don’t listen to her — she is pretty crazy at times. SCORE: 5.5GLORIA CHEEVER: He’s such a great singer! I really liked this! It was solid! This was a great song choice for him. He’s my favorite tonight! SCORE: 10MARITZA HAMILL: You go, Phily boy! Good song choice; last week you were the scary-looking stalker, this week the smooth singing gentleman … goodie goodie. SCORE: 8

“Heaven Knows” (Donna Summer)

J. CANTU AND AMANDA FLORES: Melinda is from another planet. She should NOT be on American Idol. It is not fair. Every week she blooms even more. Just when we think she cannot do any better, she does. A lot better! We loved the good up-tempo song she did this week. It’s Melinda …then everyone else. SCORE: 9

BRANDON GARCIA: I want to grab Melinda and LaKisha by the collar and demand to know why they have to pick such mediocre material — “Why must you make me hate you?!” Sure, we heard some velvety deep Melinda singing and the obligatory “lil’ ole me?” modesty, but does this show really need another Donna Summer song? As gifted as she is, these cut-rate lounge acts are going to do Melinda in. SCORE: 6.5. Free half-point for the warm pink makeup tones.

CHRIS BENITEZ: Head and shoulders (minus the neck of course) above everyone. Melinda is an awesome performer and vocalist. That’s all that needs to be mentioned — the only great performance tonight! I thought she looked nice as well; Simon didn’t like her shirt or whatever, but who cares at this point? Win this competition for all the talented artists out there! SCORE: 9

GLORIA CHEEVER: Fun, fun, fun! Is this girl ever going to sing poorly? This was a great vocal, but I have to agree with Simon — I  didn’t really like the outfit. SCORE: 9

MARITZA HAMILL: Simon no likey the outfit, and neither does America. But oh boy is the singing was good. But still giving us the surprised looks I see Melinda …”OH REALLY! Me singy goody? Ohhhh!” Thanks, Melinda, You need not apply for acting school. Singing you can do. SCORE: 8

“Lovesong” (The Cure) Watch the original

J. CANTU AND AMANDA FLORES: Should have been Amanda’s night because they are all singing her songs. We thought Blake did well with the composition he did of the Cure. That R&B sound of his is going to take him places. He did the right thing by not adding any beatbox to this song. We saw some really good vocals from Blake tonight. He gets better every week, but next week, he has to turn it up a notch — it is time. SCORE: 6

BRANDON GARCIA: Blake’s quasi-hipness and aggressively irritating beatboxing have become next to unbearable, so it was nice to get a break this week. He couldn’t have picked a better song to highlight his wistful, gentler tones. Sounds a bit like Boy George (a compliment). I still feel like his thin voice sometimes chokes on its good intentions, but so did Chris Daughtry’s. Nothing a little ProTooling can’t fix. SCORE: 7

CHRIS BENITEZ: Remember when Blake Lewis was the best male in the competition? Yeah, I believe those days are gone. While he might be popular, his voice is weak! I don’t see him getting much better either. Blake is comfortable onstage, but he shouldn’t be anymore; he needs to work on those vocal pipes of his. SCORE: 5

GLORIA CHEEVER: This was good. I think it showed a different side of him. I’m still cooling off from last week’s performance, so I have to say it wasn’t my favorite Blake performance. I like Phil just as much, contrary to what Simon might say. SCORE: 8    

MARITZA HAMILL: Thanks for not smoking…. Errrr I mean beatboxing, whatever it’s called. Now it is clear that this guy’s voice is not WOW, but there’s something about this guy that just makes me stare. He puts passion into the song and I think the guys may be a bit jealous of him. He’s that type of guy that mesmerizes you with the style of singing, not the talent. SCORE: 7

“Hey Baby” (No Doubt) Watch the originalJ. CANTU AND AMANDA FLORES: We did not like it too much. Where are those powerful vocals, Jordin? Wait to do these FUN songs for after you win. This is a competition, and you need a competition song every single week. We were hoping Jordin would challenge herself more this week. She has to make up for it next week. Hopefully, this doesn’t get her in the end. You’re in the Top 10 Jordin. C’mon, you are our girl. SCORE: 4

BRANDON GARCIA: Jordin gets props for trying to make something out of the worst No Doubt song in existence, but no dice. Paula said she looked “hip and young” — she looked more like Little Hooker on the Prairie to me in that checkered tablecloth blouse and those skimpy boots. The band was barely audible, exposing the minefield of mistakes in Jordin’s vocals. Despite the judges’ rosy comments, this was Sanjaya-level dreadful. SCORE: 3

CHRIS BENITEZ: Jordin, I didn’t hear the greatness tonight. No not at all. That song wasn’t one to wow audiences with. Now you said you wanted to have fun and try something different … well, it really wasn’t different and it wasn’t that fun. You know what would have been different and fun? An awesome performance tonight! There is no time to waste; do it, and do it right. SCORE: 7

GLORIA CHEEVER: I hate her outfit! She took a step backward in song choice. Some of the pitches were way too low. It was all kind of weird and imitated to me. Sounds like the judges agreed. Not her best. SCORE: 6 out of 10

MARITZA HAMILL: This girl is so cute. The song choice in my opinion didn’t showcase what she can do though. I still can’t believe that no one knocked the song. Yeah she did good, but definitely not her best performance. She is so talented that this made her sound karaoke-ish. SCORE: 6

 

“Don’t Speak” (No Doubt) Watch the original J. CANTU AND AMANDA FLORES: OK, Chris, we are tired of the same ol’ thing every week. You sing the same way, no matter what song you pick and ou dress the same and the moves … I could train my dog to do the same thing you do. Wave those hands, move without your neck and bounce all over the place. We want to see something else, Chris. You ride the fence and stay on it. You are a pretty boy and that will probably keep you in this week, but let’s see something else. SCORE: 5BRANDON GARCIA: Chris’ Timberlake affectations are becoming as painful as canker sores, I can’t stand his white tennis shoes and I love how Gwen called him out on his “vocal Olympics.” That aside, it was better than I expected; Chris made his first real connection with the camera. I got burned out on this song 11 years ago, so the R&B twist was refreshing and well executed. While Chris is easily a better singer than Gwen, that’s not saying much, and all in all I’m just not a fan. SCORE: 6CHRIS BENITEZ: I don’t think the R&B goes with that song at all. But I do think his performance was better than Blake’s today. I really don’t know what else to say. I will say that all the contestants are finding their own style and there are fewer bad wardrobes. That’s positive right? SCORE: 6.5

GLORIA CHEEVER: This wasn’t my favorite Chris performance, but it was kinda nice. This was a better song choice — more entertaining. I’d like to see him go back to his fun sense of style, though. SCORE: 8 

MARITZA HAMILL: Better than last week’s choice. In fact better than all his choices. Made for a nice little ending for American Idol. This guys gets my attention only every other song. He seems to be getting better, but then he throws a curveball of boredom. This week was good though. SCORE: 7

 

BRANDON GARCIA: Phil Stacey. Then Blake. Then Gina.

 

CHRIS BENITEZ: Melinda Doolittle, Gina Glocksen 

 

GLORIA CHEEVER: Phil Stacey 

MARITZA HAMILL: I can’t believe I’m saying this: Phil Stacey.

 

BRANDON GARCIA: Jordin Sparks. Haley nipping at her heels.

   

CHRIS BENITEZ: Sanjaya Malakar, Blake Lewis, and Haley Scarnato

 

GLORIA CHEEVER: Chris Sligh and Sanjaya Malakar

 

BRANDON GARCIA: Sanjaya. Haley or (gasp) LaKisha wouldn’t surprise me.

 

CHRIS BENITEZ: Haley Scarnato

 

GLORIA CHEEVER: Chris Sligh 

 

MARITZA HAMILL: Chris Sligh

——————————–

Will Chris Sligh be the unlucky one? Or will it be Sanjaya or Haley? Tune in Wednesday at 8 p.m. for results.

 

The Austin Powers mojo brings a much-needed dose of surprise as the sixth season of American Idol is taken over by the British Invasion. The producers remind us that the show isn’t just a singing competition — it’s a chance to thaw out forgotten stars like Lulu and Herman (of Hermits fame) after decades in the cryogenic chambers for one last, glorious moment in front of millions and millions of fanatic preteen girls — a girl named Ashley, in particular.

“Don’t let the tattoos and the motorcycle fool you,” she says.

While Motorhead might safely assume she’s in the fan club, Ashlee Simpson and Justin Timberlake may be surprised to find they have an unlikely admirer in Miriam Ramirez, a features reporter for The Monitor and the first of our guest judges here on Idol Chat.  

“I love Judas Priest — I’ve seen them twice,” Miriam says, followed immediately by: “I love *NSYNC — I’ve seen them twice.” 

Miriam is also a sucker for Kelly Clarkson and tonight will be contributing the same critical view she brought to Laguna Beach as a blogger for Pop Culture Junkies (popculturejunkies.com). But while “Since U Been Gone” might follow “Two Minutes To Midnight” on her playlist, it’s not such a tough call when it comes down to picking favorites. 

A Kelly Clarkson-Justin Timberlake once-in-a-lifetime concert, or Iron Maiden’s final tour of all time? 

She thinks for a second. “Iron Maiden.”

BRANDON GARCIA: The early weeks of the finals are the most exciting every year — all the really boring contestants are usually gone, and these sadistic theme nights really make for some unforgettably off-the-wall television. Tonight exemplified that trend: British Invasion Week gave us a peek at Lulu’s amazing tarantula eyelashes circa 1962, one of the best ever so-ungodly-it’s-good performances courtesy of Sanjaya … but most of all, we got to meet Ashley, the Jan Brady of the 21^st Century. Sitting in the audience, Ashley clasped her hands and wept, literally wept in ecstasy over tonight’s star-studded lineup. It was as if Jesus himself were on the Idol stage singing and shaking his hips just for her. Ashley’s speechless mouth hung open for two straight hours as strands of mousy blond hair streamed down her apple cheeks and over her braces. One thing’s for sure: Ashley needs to become a permanent fixture in the auditorium. She embodies everything that this show stands for.

MIRIAM RAMIREZ: This week, it was a combination of nerves and excitement. I knew the British Invasion theme would be fantabulous and we would get to hear a lot of the songs re-emerging on the pop scene today. However, for R&B-drive singers like LaKisha, Melinda and Stephanie  considered the stronger of the bunch-I was nervous to see how they would take this style and make it their own. Brit pop isn’t easily executed and even harder to digest if you’re not familiar. Nonetheless, I was pulling for all 11 Idol hopefuls because every week the stakes get higher and someone must go home. 

GLORIA CHEEVER: This week was so much better … and the girls looked amazing! I felt a better vibe — maybe even a more competitive vibe this week. This was much less disappointing than last week. 

Click on the contestants’ names to see their performances from last week on YouTube. 

“Tell Him” (The Exciters/Billie Davis) Watch the original 

J. CANTU & AMANDA FLORES: Oh, Ms. Haley. Was nice to see her kick it up a notch. Finally it is something better than Sandy in the Broadway musical Grease. Her choice of song was pretty good. She will not be here very long, but she is smart by wearing what she is wearing. She will get the same vote Antonella was getting. Good move, but that will only take her so far. Haley is not an American Idol. Sorry Haley. SCORE: 4 out of 10

BRANDON GARCIA: Knowing she doesn’t measure up to her competition on a technical level, Haley stripped down to a pair of hotpants and let her legs deal with getting votes. She threw down the gauntlet tonight, even going as far as giving the little girls in the front rows a soft-core lap dance. Playing the harlot card coincidentally gave a little boost to her anemic vocals, and all in all it was probably the best she’s done so far. Not sexy, but at least a good imitation of sexy. SCORE: 4.5 out of 10

MIRIAM RAMIREZ: So she’s cute and flirtatious. Performing a Billie Davis song perhaps suited her this time, with the spunky attitude and all. Does she have what it takes to be an American Idol? Not this time. Our Texas gal did well tonight but should really work on keeping up with the singing. She got a bit winded from time to time (climbing steps in heels is hard work) but overall delivered a pretty good, not wonderful, performance. I think she’s safe, for now. SCORE: 5 out of 10

GLORIA CHEEVER: She looks amazing! In the words of my husband, “her outfit was a little distracting.” I don’t think he’ll be the only one. I, on the other hand, was listening to her sing and I thought she did really well. The song showed off her voice more than any other song she’s done. I think she’ll be back next week. SCORE: 7 out of 10 

MARITZA HAMILL: I just came from Disney World and I didn’t see here there. That’s because she finally stepped it up notch. Haley, you were cute. Simon is right, right about people ain’t just going to be talking about the singing tonight. Although she did not look comfortable walking in the heels. Attire was almost perfect, the shirt was a bit to shiny or outdated, but altogether it did work. She may not be the next American Idol, but she put on a good show tonight. Disney’s still got it. SCORE: 7 out of 10

“Don’t Let The Sun Catch You Crying Tonight” (Gerry and the Pacemakers) Watch the original

J. CANTU & AMANDA FLORES: Chris tried to shy away from the Justin thing, but he will not get out of the teeny bop thing. He is the centerfold in Tiger Beat magazine … is that still around? Chris once again chose a song that is very safe, does not show any vocals and he will rely on his looks to get ahead. He does not push the envelope. Sings and looks like he belongs in the boy band. I hear Menudo is making a comeback. The boys are so much more weaker than the weakest woman. SCORE: 5 out of 10

BRANDON GARCIA: Guest coach Peter Noone (Herman) begged Chris Richardson to lay off the Timberlake. Chris obliged, and it made for a pleasing performance if not anything you’d mistake for “fun.” The song sounded like something playing over the loudspeakers at Dillard’s, and despite an earnest, mature rendition, Chris seems even more bereft of star quality when he can’t mimic his *NSYNC idol. Placing him next to the B.B. King-ish guitar player at the beginning made him seem even more like an amateur. SCORE: 6

MIRIAM RAMIREZ: Yawn. I think I took a snack break. Sure he’s a good singer and did well, but if the judges say tonight was his best? Yikes. His song choice was safe, though pitchy at times, and overall made it through in one piece. But like the Gerry and Pacemakers, which could never quite catch up to the Beatles, Chris might not be able to catch up to the better singers in this competition. SCORE: 4 out of 10

GLORIA CHEEVER: This song was a little boring, but I did like the guitar and the performance. This was definitely a different side to him. I have no comment on the vocal aspect of his performance. It wasn’t pushed — just a nice, controlled sound.  SCORE: 7 out of 10 

MARITZA HAMILL: This guy needs to shave … call me old-fashioned, but the scruffy look is just not good. There are only few and far between who can pull it off. He needs to be bald by choice; it works for him. The song. No girlish screams here. I know he is a favorite, just not mine … SCORE: Lame out of 10

“You Don’t Have To Say You Love Me” (Dusty Springfield) Watch the original

J. CANTU & AMANDA FLORES: What in the world happened? Did she not talk to the band during rehearsal? She was in a completely different key. Stephanie has been driven by her vocals, but the bottom came completely off tonight. The song was not what she needed. She needs to choose a soulful song. Sorry Stephanie, but there wasn’t any soul here. It really looked like her nerves overcame her. She did not perform like a person who is competing in American Idol. You are in trouble, Stephanie. SCORE: 4 out of 10

BRANDON GARCIA: Knowing full well where this runaway train was headed, Lulu stabbed Beyoncé in the eye by comparing her to Stephanie tonight. Stephanie sang this torch song as if she were having a tapeworm pulled yard for yard out of her stomach. From the first note, she looked petrified in her turquoise tube skirt; each moment she tried to abstain from bursting into her usual vocal-run orgasms was excruciating for both her and us. Season 4’s Nadia Turner did a bang-up job with this same song, and that fond memory only emphasized what a humiliating stumble this is for Stephanie. Just to make sure she doesn’t get any sleep tonight, Simon topped it all off by telling her “I think you’re losing your soul.” See, Steph? Don’t mock the Request Line. SCORE: 3.5 out of 10

MIRIAM RAMIREZ: I definitely have to agree with Simon tonight. Stephanie is a good singer but is slowly falling through the cracks. Maybe this week’s theme threw her off a bit, but it’s obvious she’s a great singer and she needs to bounce back in to the ring. It was an appropriate song choice, along the lines of Motown as Dusty Springfield was known for, but it wasn’t an earth-shattering performance. She’s safe, though. SCORE: 4.5 out of 10

GLORIA CHEEVER: She looks beautiful! This gal is so classy (could’ve done without the boots, though). Her last note went a little sharp. The song is great — it just wasn’t a great choice for her. Not my favorite performance. SCORE: 6 out of 10 

MARITZA HAMILL: She needed more air in her voice … not enough volume. She blends in like a smoothie. Nothing really separates her from the others. Kinda liked half of the outfit… but not enough to make this song GRRRRRR….. the big guys are going to begin to trample her sweet voice. SCORE: 6 out of 10

“Time of the Season” (The Zombies) Watch the original 

J. CANTU & AMANDA FLORES: Blake is starting to come around for the guys. If anyone has a chance, it is Blake. He made an old song sound cool again. Smooth and jazzy. We really liked Blake’s presentation tonight. He did not change it like last week, but did make it his own. We believe he has figured out what making it your own means. Good job. That song could be on the radio. He added his beat, but not too much, just enough to make it his own. We had to rewind and hear that twice. SCORE: 7 out of 10

BRANDON GARCIA: “Don’t let ‘the business’ get in the way of the song,” Peter Noone implored, but Blake brushed off his pleas and gave us more obligatory beatboxing and another arrangement that felt oddly empty. Blake fared a little better tonight, his performance drifting occasionally into mesmerizing before descending back into vertigo. I recommended this song for Stephanie (who’s crying now?), but Blake charged it with a hint of the wistful Morrissey-esque style he sometimes feels like sharing. Even with the neato Wonderbread-logo lighting, Blake sank under the weight of his poor lower register and his pitiful dancing. SCORE: 5.5. I docked him a whole point for that Elvis move similar to the one Brandon Rogers did last week, the one he’ll regret for the rest of his life.

MIRIAM RAMIREZ: And then there’s Blake. I’m really not sure what to think of this boy band clone. I like him, or don’t I? I just don’t know. For his rendition of “Time of the Season,” I was entertained and pulling for him but I got worried with the range. Blake’s got great style, a very contemporary and marketable look, but I’m over the whole beatboxing. He will be a force to be reckoned with, I’m afraid, in the coming weeks. His charisma will take him pretty far. SCORE: 6.5 out of 10 

GLORIA CHEEVER: This was so provocative in such a subtle way. I really liked how he makes the songs his own. He is one talented guy! The dancing didn’t hurt, either. SCORE: 9 out of 10

MARITZA HAMILL: “WHO’S YOUR DADDY? Is he rich like me?” Not bad Blake. You got me sick of the beep-pooping and practically wiped it out. Good call. And super good song choice. He was (as the DAWG would say) “In the zone.” Tonight I think was his best….. very likeable. And a cool-cat-daddy-O performance. SCORE: 8 out of 10

“Diamonds Are Forever” (Shirley Bassey) Watch the original 

J. CANTU & AMANDA FLORES: LaKisha should have paid attention to the instructions she was given. She should have chosen the second song. The song she chose did not have the intensity she had on the previous weeks. She is LaKisha and she has a great voice, but her song did not help her any. She also took a step backwards with her wardrobe. It was “sing a ‘60s song,” not look like the ‘60s. Good attempt, but we know she can do a whole lot better. SCORE: 7 out of 10

BRANDON GARCIA: LaKisha once again showed her utter disregard for the guest coach’s opinion by choosing this song over the one Lulu thought she should sing — unlike last week, it was a good move. This characteristically trippy theme from one of the early 007 movies gave LaKisha a chance to be someone other than Jennifer Hudson, producing some mixed results in the process. Her seldom-heard deeper notes were soothing but wildly off-pitch at one point. And even though she looked fetching in — you guessed it — lots of diamonds and a green dress that barely kept her mammoth breasts from crushing the audience, there were moments when she simply seemed absent. I liked the change of pace, but I wish she would’ve added more of her bawdy Miss Piggy outbursts to the mix. SCORE: 6.5 out of 10

MIRIAM RAMIREZ: Absolutely adored her song choice (and of course it reminded me of Kanye West’s version) but again, I agree with Simon. She aged a few decades and became this overzealous lounge singer-minus being draped on a piano. LaKisha has a set of pipes and competitive talent. She’s got to maintain that ‘wow’ factor to stay on top. Otherwise, Melinda will sniper her out of the competition. SCORE: 7 out of 10

GLORIA CHEEVER: She looks beautiful! I love how this was presented — the lights, her jewelry. I don’t think it was her absolute best, but even on a bad day she can sound sensational. SCORE: 8 out of 10 

MARITZA HAMILL: RAT-TAT-TAT-TAT…….{{{{{TA TA TA TA TA}}}}}}}}…..007 at your service! As soon as I heard this song I dropped to the floor and began slithering across my tweed throw rug…. Looked up with a devilish half grin and then realized that my friends were not impressed… “wHaT tHe hEcK are you doing Maritza,” one asked as he sipped his SlimFast martini with a twist of marshmallow (don’t dare ask). Although I felt invincible for a second, LaKisha was, dare I say, not … to the judges. She picked a cool song, but a song that indeed made her sound old. Sorry Lakey, you get a … SCORE: 7 out of 10

 “Tobacco Road” (Nashville Teens) Watch the original 

J. CANTU & AMANDA FLORES: Everyone in this competition has a nook that is helping them push through the weeks; unfortunately, Phil does not. He did not choose a good song this week. His vocals had been better every week, but this song did not explore his vocals. Was a super fun song, but those are the ones people sing on their way out of American Idol. Phil is not a rocker and shouldn’t attempt to be one. We believe Phil is going home this week. We don’t see anything keeping him in this week. Sorry Phil. SCORE: 4 out of 10

BRANDON GARCIA: In the past Phil has reminded me of Steve Buscemi and Gizmo, but tonight it felt like watching the skeleton from A Nightmare Before Christmas trying to rock a blues revival. Phil was corny and manic where he needed to be smooth and nasty, and his “gritless” voice was neutered by the B.B. King lookalike guitar player. His voice works best with middle-of-the-road soft rock, plus he’s one of more rough-around-the-edges contestants who could benefit from a few more weeks to find his footing. As much as he’s grown on me, I think it’s back to sailing the ocean blue in an ice-cream parlor uniform for Phil after tomorrow. SCORE: 4

MIRIAM RAMIREZ: Next. Seriously folks, when will this torture end? He’s a decent singer and picked an OK song but he stepped outside of his wholesome box and pretty much eased his way out the door. He has no style and lacks the edge needed to channel your inner rockstar. I’m afraid he’s a goner. SCORE: 3.5 out of 10

GLORIA CHEEVER: I don’t like his outfit tonight. However, week after week, I comment on how much I like his voice. He has great technique! It’s never pushed. I hope he doesn’t go home. I think he has lots of potential. SCORE: 6.5 out of 10

MARITZA HAMILL: Beam me up, Scottie … you’re going home, Spock. Phil singing with backup singers. Phil screwing up the backup singers groove. Not the best choice of song. This guy kinda creeps me. He is soooo hit or miss. I am not impressed, just a bit freaked out. SCORE: 3 out of 10

 

“I Who Have Nothing” (Shirley Bassey) Watch the original

J. CANTU & AMANDA FLORES: This is the person to watch out for. Women are so much more powerful than the men. She really listened and turned this song into a winner. She can sing! Her notes were so much in control and so smooth. Her great personality doesn’t hurt either. Awesome, Jordin! SCORE: 8 out of 10

BRANDON GARCIA: I’m just going to pretend Jordin never said the song that most described her as a human being is “I’m So Excited” by The Pointer Sisters. Jordin played for keeps tonight with a passionate performance that was miles ahead of the juvenile Disney retreads she’s done in the past. Even though she hasn’t been my favorite contestant, I predicted last week that she’s going to win this year, and tonight she managed to both confirm my forecast and suggest that she deserves it. She showed her immense skills as a singer, met the melodramatic song on its level and hinted at something resembling artistic vision. Or maybe the flat-ironed hair just threw me off. SCORE: 8.5 out of 10

MIRIAM RAMIREZ: Love her! Hands down my absolute favorite. Jordin could’ve opted for a much cuter outfit, though she looked dazzling nonetheless. Her song, performed by the great Tom Jones, Shirley Bassey and Ben E. King, was moving and although dark, a tremendous performance. Simon says it was depressing (and it was) but tears will get you everywhere! With Jordin, she could be singing about the end of the world and I would love it. I truly believe she is Melinda’s biggest competition. SCORE: 8.5 out of 10

GLORIA CHEEVER: She’s so beautiful! This was once again a fantastic vocal from her. There’s lots of power in that young voice. I’m glad she’s picking songs that show off her voice because I didn’t realize how exquisite her sound is until last week. SCORE: 9 out of 10

MARITZA HAMILL: WHO’S YOUR DADDY! Your still Maritza’s favorite since day uno! Woooo-whoo! The new hairdo make her look like a pretty version of Ugly Betty. I normally don’t like them ballads, but oh dear this one was one to hear again. She is winning this game, she has found her voice. SCORE: 9 out of 10

“You Really Got Me” (The Kinks) Watch the original

J. CANTU & AMANDA FLORES: Not matter what Sanjaya does now, there is no way he can pull out of this. Who was this and what did you do with Sanjaya? It almost sounded like someone else. Don’t get us wrong, it is still as awful as ever, just a different awful. Is lip-syncing allowed on AI? It almost looked like it. Sanjaya, GO HOME! The little girl crying is what is keeping him in week after week. There is no way we could ever put a song by him on the radio. Ya! SCORE: 3 out of 10

BRANDON GARCIA: “Crocodile Rock” by John Stevens. “Cry Ev’ry Mountain” by Anthony Federov. They left us sitting bewildered in front of our televisions, stunned at seeing human civilization sink to a new low, disturbed and exhilarated by the unrivaled joy we felt at being there to see it. And now, “You Really Got Me” by Sanjaya Malakar. Tonight, America’s favorite androgynous matinee idol gave us what will come to be known as the zenith of bad A.I. performances. The producers chucked the show’s last morsel of credibility into the bonfire and gave us exactly what we wanted: Sanjaya as the night’s “rocker;” Sanjaya completely abandoning the melody for a stupefying howl; but most of all, Ashley, her wide eyes alight with transcendence. Forget that it would have been jaw-dropping for any non-Idol watcher who just happened to flip the channel. Forget that it’s a huge step forward for Sanjaya, who countered weeks of whispered ridicule by dropping an atom bomb on America. “I think the little girl’s face said it all,” Simon said. Folks, this is as good as it gets. SCORE: 8 out of 10. “8?!” you ask. Trust me. This was a classic.

MIRIAM RAMIREZ: Does his mother know he’s playing “rockstar” tonight? Pobre. OK, so he broke out of his shell a bit, but he butchered one of the best Kinks songs ever. I think we’ve come to a point where we don’t pay much attention to this young singer, hoping his turn will be up soon. Trust me, it will be soon. SCORE: 3.5 out of 10

GLORIA CHEEVER: Well, this was much better, but still a little scary. It was pushed, but his performance has improved somewhat. He still has a lot of work to do, but at least we could hear him this week. SCORE: 5 out of 10

MARITZA HAMILL: …………….. Howard Stern, stop it already. OK, OK … now I think I want to even vote for this guy. Sanjaya, you need to send Howard a big basket of dollars and beer. His little fan in the audience is the crazy now. But oh soo cute… this guy has the vote. Heck if he ran for president … OK I wont go there. SCORE: 5 for making his fans cry of happiness out of 10  

 

“Paint It Black” (The Rolling Stones) Watch the original

J. CANTU & AMANDA FLORES: Our rocker girl. She is still trying to prove she is a rocker, and too much at that. We know you rock, Gina, show us something else in that leather. It was very high energy, and we know this was a rock song, but too much of a rock song for AI. Tone it down a bit and show us what you can do. You are very good and have seen better. SCORE: 5 out of 10 BRANDON GARCIA: Gina did her best to “devour” the Rolling Stones’ “Paint It Black” as Lulu suggested. I would have chosen “Gimme Shelter” for some depth, but she couldn’t have asked for a better tune to establish her image as the goth-rock chick. Gina’s performance proved once again how difficult it is to do rock on Idol. Like Phil but not as bad, Gina lost track of the melody amid the blaring noises of the band on overdrive. Simon noted that some parts were “moments of complete torture,” and while that phrase makes me smile, I didn’t agree, and I thought she did a superb job with the end. SCORE: 7 out of 10. I should dock a half-point for meeting her criticisms with the standard “Well, I had fun” answer, but oh well.MIRIAM RAMIREZ: I think Gina forgot she could sing. And unfortunately channeling her inner Rolling Stone didn’t help much. With Gina, Simon says it’s style over content and I somewhat agree, but just because she’s got a few red highlights and a couple studs in her belt doesn’t mean she’s gotta be the next Joan Jett. I think Gina is confused about what direction she should take musically. She has a few more shows on her side but Gina is no American Idol. SCORE: 4.5 out of 10

GLORIA CHEEVER: The vocal was good — but I didn’t love the performance. I think she should’ve taken it up still another half step. She had a hard time on the low notes. I like Gina — I hope she stays. SCORE: 6 out of 10 

MARITZA HAMILL: Bad girl. Bad song choice … bad, bad, bad. Yeah this is up her alley, but sang so wrong. Off key, and out of tune. I wanted to smack her with a big mop named Sanjaya. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH, no. SCORE: 4 out of 10

“She’s Not There” (The Zombies) Watch the original

J. CANTU & AMANDA FLORES: Thank god the glasses are back. We don’t know what he was trying to do. We are still on the Chris bandwagon, but it’s time to turn it up a notch. C’mon, Chris. Use the stage; you don’t have to high five everyone. Show us some power behind that voice. It is lacking. Our Chris is back, but he is starting at the beginning and has to work this way up again. SCORE: 6 out of 10

BRANDON GARCIA: My advice for Chris S. was to get over himself when he takes the stage, and he listened. He’s the first contestant this year to perform entirely on a cheesy promenade through the audience. While he loses himself on the bombastic chorus (as he’s done before), he voice is note-perfect on the verses, and it’s a very good fit for the song. And while I didn’t feel one note of sadness in Chris’ rendition of this lovelorn tune, I did appreciate the return of his snarky attitude. SCORE: 7.5 out of 10. A free half-point for “Bring Chubby Back.”

MIRIAM RAMIREZ: Doing a Zombies song is tough, so I’ll give Fro Patrol some credit. But Chris to me is one of those performers that needs a few more years to hone in on his talent (meaning sing in a few cover bands to realize he has some talent). I liked him a lot at the beginning of the season but he hasn’t done much for me lately. He can carry a tune well and seems like a wonderful person so I hope he’s not given the boot just yet. He’s too nice. (I wish I was) SCORE: 4 out of 10

GLORIA CHEEVER: This was OK for me. The song showed off his voice — but it still wasn’t my favorite. He is a great singer, though. SCORE: 5.5 out of 10 

MARITZA HAMILL: Singing= good, Boring= yes… I thing this guy is good but is a flatline. No more standing out in a good way. He’s not going to make it to the end because he is not eye candy. I like his song choice very much so, but the American Idol vote is just not strong enough for this guy. ttfn…. SCORE: 7.5 out of 10

“As Long As He Needs Me” (From Oliver!) Watch the original

J. CANTU & AMANDA FLORES: WOW! What can we say about Melinda? She is somewhere else. She should not be in this competition because it’s not fair for the others. She is a woman among kids. She wraps you in her voice like a used San Marcos blanket. She really kicks it up a notch a là Emeril. We are so excited to see what else she has coming. Melinda … you rock! SCORE: 9 out of 10

BRANDON GARCIA: “Me? Talented?” I’m no longer buying Melinda’s aw-shucks act. She’s easily the best singer in the crowd and it’s impossible to believe that she doesn’t realize that, especially when everyone — the viewers, the judges, the media — is talking about her. Tonight she gave her weakest performance yet, which in perspective is still light years beyond some of her opponents’ best work. And not coincidentally, she was meeker than ever, even adding a dash of The Goonies’ Sloth to her incredulous face. She claimed she was out of her comfort zone, but this is a Broadway/cabaret song over 40 years old — how is it any different than anything else she’s sung? How does this torch song even count as British Invasion material? Melinda is playing the Idol game: She absolutely must seem like an underdog if she hopes to win. No one in their right mind would wear that hideous gray smock on national television without an ulterior motive. It made her boobs look like really high lonjas. If that isn’t enough to earn her personal “stylist” a trip to the gallows, I don’t know what is. SCORE: 7.5 out of 10

MIRIAM RAMIREZ: I like the sign in the audience tonight, “Melinda Do Lots” which explains to what height Melinda will go in her career. She owns this competition, vocally, but the question still remains if Melinda can carry herself off the stage too. As Idols, they have to be charming, energetic and steal the spotlight … with Melinda I want to shake her up a bit and tell her to buy some confidence on the way in. Modesty is one thing; sheepish personalities are best left for backup singers. (Gosh I’m on a rampage tonight, people). Melinda has nothing to worry about (except her wardrobe) which means she will be around until the deciding vote. SCORE: 8.5 out of 10

GLORIA CHEEVER: What was she doing as a back-up singer?! Lord, this girl can sing! Week after week, she comes back and just brings it! Boring song turned fabulous! I think she’s going to take this. I love how you can see the story in her eyes — that makes a good performer great. SCORE: 9 out of 10

MARITZA HAMILL: She is a good singer, yes we have established this. In a league of her blah…. The best blah….. Come on Melinda….. gimme some funky crazy song… not this beautifully predictable bologna. And the surprised looks…. Sigh…. Stop.. or you’re getting some Sanjaya slaps too. SCORE: 7 out of 10  MIRIAM RAMIREZ: I have to say I wasn’t too disappointed tonight. I consider myself a pretty tough pseudo-judge (as if I have any singing experience) but being around music nearly all of my life, I know what I want to hear. I want to be entertained and I want singers to convince me that they are as passionate as their audience. I worry some of these guys and gals are trying too hard to impress and forgetting about their passion for music. Though I agree with Simon about 99.9 percent of the time, being the best singer isn’t ALWAYS the deciding factor. I know it’s early, but some of these people don’t have that “star” quality…and I hope they can prove me wrong. Melinda is by far, the best vocalist … but Jordin has charisma and it’s easy to fall in love with her. These two will go head-to-head in the end…

BRANDON GARCIA: Jordin Sparks, for connecting with me on a (relatively) emotional level. Several others who were just as good.

 

MIRIAM RAMIREZ: Jordin Sparks, Melinda Dolittle

GLORIA CHEEVER: Jordin Sparks

 

BRANDON GARCIA: Stephanie

  

MIRIAM RAMIREZ: Phil Stacey, Sanjaya Malakar, Gina Glocksen

GLORIA CHEEVER: Sanjaya Malakar

 

J. CANTU & AMANDA FLORES: Phil is going home.

 

BRANDON GARCIA: Phil. Each year we get one “terrible” singer in the Top 12, and in the past they’ve usually been sent home the week they did their best. But Sanjaya’s performance lies beyond the boundaries of logic, and I think he’ll survive. Sucks for Phil.

 

MIRIAM RAMIREZ: Phil Stacey or Sanjaya Malakar

 

GLORIA CHEEVER: Gina or Sanjaya

 

MARITZA HAMILL: Gina Gina Bo Beana

——————————————————– 

The Idol Chat judges are split between Gina, Sanjaya or Phil to head home tomorrow. Come back at 7:30 p.m. for live results. Much thanks to Miriam Ramirez.